Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant
Directed by Paul Weitz
By Scott A. Gray

In an interesting twist of Hollywood fate, Chris and Paul Weitz have entered the final stretch of 2009 each in control of a major vampire franchise built from the pages of popular young adult fiction.

From one half of the brotherly team who brought us American Pie and About A Boy we get the second part of the pouty vomitorium "tweenlight saga" New Moon. From the other, Cirque du Freak, with John C. Reilly, Ken Watanabe, Salma Hayek, Patrick Fugit and Willem Dafoe. Which do you figure would be more fun for anyone not stuffing extra Kleenex in their training bra for the trip to the theatre?

The Vampire's Assistant feels like it's partly aimed at taking the piss out of its genre brethren and partly intended as an adventurous, if often clichéd, romp through a fantastic world of freaks. Darren Shan is goodie two-shoes to his best buddy Steve's shit disturber. The former completely obsessed by spiders and the latter, vampires. Both encounter the respective objects of their fixations after being tossed a mysterious flyer for a freak show.

It's a sludgy crawl to the laughs and action but by the time the boys reach the freak show it's mostly full speed ahead. After brief performances by the Snake Boy, the Bearded Lady, Ribs, Wolfman and Corma Limbs, Larten Crepsley takes the stage and John C. Reilly owns the rest of the film. A song, a dance and an incredibly rare poisonous spider later, Darren sneaks backstage in an uncharacteristic instance of defiance to indulge in arachnid napping.

Hiding in a closet, Darren witnesses an exchange between Steve and Crepsley where Steve begs to be made a vampire but is rejected on account of his "bad blood." The mysterious Mr. Tiny helps Darren escape with the spider and invites him to join his dark family. Darren declines and then foolishly brings the spider to school the next day, where it bites Steve, putting him in a coma. Seeking an antidote, Darren confesses to Crepsley and cuts a deal to become his half-vampire assistant in exchange for Steve's life.

There's a lot of ground to cover in the plot, with a burgeoning war between the peaceful vampires and the murderous "vampanese"; the destinies of two friends pushed apart by jealousy and circumstance; and the awakening of Darren's powers and resistance to loosing even a shred of his humanity.

Chris Massoglia and Josh Hutcherson are capable leads, both playing it relatively straight against the crazy world they've been thrust into. Reilly shrugs off the string of dim-witted, pseudo-buffoons he's played recently, investing Crepsley with sharp cynicism and cold wit, proving once again that his versatility can elevate any picture.

While subject to some of its genre tropes, Cirque du Freak is a richly entertaining world worth returning to for the grand adventure this first instalment sets up. (Universal)
Film Reviews: The Twilight Saga: New Moon - Dir. by Chris Weitz
Film Reviews: Planet 51 - Dir. by Jorge Blanco
Film Reviews: Mary and Max - Dir. by Adam Elliott
Film Reviews: The Blind Side - Dir. by John Lee Hancock
Film Reviews: Fantastic Mr. Fox - Dir. by Wes Anderson
Film Reviews: Precious: Based on the Novel “Push” by Sapphire - Dir. by Lee Edwards
Film Reviews: Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans - Dir. by Werner Herzog
Videogame Reviews: GTA IV: The Ballad of Gay Tony [Xbox 360]
Videogame Reviews: Dragon Age: Origins [Multi-platform]
Dvd Reviews: The Limits Of Control - Dir. by Jim Jarmusch
Dvd Reviews: In The Loop - Dir. by Armando Iannucci
Dvd Reviews: I Sell the Dead - Dir. by Glenn McQuaid
Dvd Reviews: Thirst - Dir. by Park Chan-wook
Dvd Reviews: Up - Dir. by Pete Docter
Dvd Reviews: Brüno - Dir. by Larry Charles
Dvd Reviews: Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian - Dir. by Shawn Levy
Dvd Reviews: The Transformers The Complete Series
Dvd Reviews: Franklyn - Dir. by Gerald McMorrow
Dvd Reviews: My One and Only - Dir. by Richard Loncraine
Dvd Reviews: My Effortless Brilliance - Dir. by Lynn Shelton
Music DVD Reviews: Marilyn Manson - Guns, God and Government Live in L.A. [Blu-Ray]
Dvd Reviews: Monty Python: Almost the Truth The Laywer’s Cut
Dvd Reviews: Battlestar Galactica: The Plan - Dir. by Edward James Olmos
Film Reviews: The Horse Boy - Dir. by Michel Orion Scott
Film Reviews: Love & Savagery - Dir. by John N. Smith
Film Reviews: Pirate Radio - Dir. by Richard Curtis
Film Reviews: I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell - Dir. by Bob Gosse
Film Reviews: 2012 - Dir. by Roland Emmerich
Film Reviews: The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day - Dir. by Troy Duffy
Film Reviews: Antichrist - Dir. by Lars von Trier
Film Reviews: Prom Night in Mississippi - Dir. by Paul Saltzman
Music DVD Reviews: Brutal Truth - For the Ugly and Unwanted: This Is Grindcore
Music DVD Reviews: Bob Marley - Stations of the Cross
Dvd Reviews: Aliens in the Attic - Dir. by John Schultz
Dvd Reviews: National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation: 20th Anniversary Collector’s Edition [Blu-ray] - Dir. by Jeremiah S. Chechik
Dvd Reviews: Kathy Griffin: She’ll Cut a Bitch - Dir. by Paul Miller
Dvd Reviews: The Ugly Truth - Dir. by Robert Luketic
Dvd Reviews: Merry Sitcom! Christmas Classics From TV’s Golden Age
Dvd Reviews: Animation Express
Dvd Reviews: Passchendaele - Dir. by Paul Gross
Dvd Reviews: Bald - Dir. by Blake Leibel
Dvd Reviews: Mystery Science Theater 3000 XVI
Dvd Reviews: Film Noir Classics 1 - Dir. by Various
Dvd Reviews: The L-Word: The Complete Final Season
Dvd Reviews: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero Box Set
Dvd Reviews: Il Divo - Dir. by Paolo Sorrentino
Film Reviews: The Box - Dir. by Richard Kelly
Film Reviews: The Fourth Kind - Dir. by Olatunde Osunsanmi
Film Reviews: A Christmas Carol - Dir. by Robert Zemeckis
Film Reviews: Gentlemen Broncos - Dir. by Jared Hess
Film Reviews: Inside Hana’s Suitcase - Dir. by Larry Weinstein
Music DVD Reviews: Damon & Naomi - 1001 Nights
Music DVD Reviews: Leonard Cohen & His Army - Leonard Cohen Live at the Isle of Wight 1970
Music DVD Reviews: Roxy Music - The Story of Roxy Music: More Than This
Dvd Reviews: Orphan [Blu-Ray] - Dir. by Jaume Collet-Serra
Dvd Reviews: G. I. Joe — Season 1.2
Dvd Reviews: The Taking of Pelham 123 - Dir. by Tony Scott
Dvd Reviews: The Narrows - Dir. by Francois Valle
Dvd Reviews: The Answer Man - Dir. by John Hindman
Dvd Reviews: Easy Rider — 40th Anniversary Edition [Blu-Ray] - Dir. by Dennis Hopper
Dvd Reviews: Monsters Vs. Aliens - Dir. by Rob Letterman and Conrad Vernon
Film Reviews: More than a Game - Dir. by Kristopher Belman
Film Reviews: Amreeka - Dir. by Charion Dabis
Film Reviews: The Collector - Dir. by Marcus Dunstan
Film Reviews: Bronson - Dir. by Nicolas Winding Refn
Dvd Reviews: Vega$: The First Season — Volume 1
Dvd Reviews: Stan Helsing - Dir. by Bo Zenga
Dvd Reviews: Spin City: Season Three
Dvd Reviews: Natural Born Killers — Director’s Cut - Dir. by Oliver Stone
Dvd Reviews: Frownland - Dir. by Ronald Bronstein
Dvd Reviews: Flashpoint: The First Season
Dvd Reviews: Afterwards - Dir. by Gilles Bourdos
Film Reviews: Michael Jackson’s This Is It - Dir. by Kenny Ortega
Film Reviews: Three Blind Mice - Dir. by Matthew Newton
Film Reviews: The September Issue - Dir. by R.J. Cutler
Film Reviews: Astroboy - Dir. by David Bowers
Film Reviews: Amelia - Dir. by Mira Nair
Music DVD Reviews: Various - The Secret Policeman Rocks!
Music DVD Reviews: The Beatles - Rare and Unseen
Music DVD Reviews: The Moody Blues - Live at the Isle of Wight Festival 1970
Music DVD Reviews: All the Way From Michigan Not Mars - Dir. by Matt Boyd
Dvd Reviews: Gigantic - Dir. by Matt Aselton
Dvd Reviews: The Proposal - Dir. by Anne Fletcher
Dvd Reviews: Andy Barker, P.I. The Complete Series
Dvd Reviews: 30 Rock Season 3
Dvd Reviews: High School Record - Dir. by Ben Wolfinsohn
Dvd Reviews: I Love You, Beth Cooper - Dir. by Chris Columbus
Dvd Reviews: Year One - Dir. by Harold Ramis
Dvd Reviews: Superman/Batman: Public Enemies [Blu-Ray] - Dir. by Sam Liu
Dvd Reviews: Dead Snow - Dir. by Tommy Wirkola
Dvd Reviews: Nip/Tuck: Season Five, Part Two
Film Reviews: Taqwacore - Dir. by Omar Majeed
Film Reviews: The Men Who Stare At Goats - Dir. by Grant Heslov
Film Reviews: The Men Who Stare At Goats - Dir. by Grant Heslov
Grizzly Bear - Vogue Theatre, Vancouver, BC October 14
Before the release of 2009's Veckatimest, Grizzly Bear stood at a career watershed of sorts. Critical darlings without much mainstream success, they could very well have continued in the direction set with 2007's Friend EP and become perennial indie overachievers, in the vein of the Li... Full Review
Hostage Life - Centre Of The Universe
It's unfortunate the words "maturity" and "growth" are stigmas in the world of punk rock. They would be the perfect descriptors for Toronto, ON-based Hostage Life's tertiary release. Maintaining the adage that a band never realize their true potential until their third album, the quintet prove thems... Full Review
Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant Dir. by Paul Weitz
In an interesting twist of Hollywood fate, Chris and Paul Weitz have entered the final stretch of 2009 each in control of a major vampire franchise built from the pages of popular young adult fiction.

From one half of the brotherly team who brought us American Pie and About ... Full Review
Viewing the October 2009 Issue: • Contents Page • News • Click Hear • Articles --> On the Cover  •  Front Five  •  Points  •  Questionnaire  •  Release Dates  •  Timeline  •  Videogames  •  Conversations • Music Reviews --> Recently Reviewed  •  Aggressive Tendencies  •  Beats & Rhymes  •  Destination Out  •  Frequencies  •  Groove  •  No Future  •  Pop Rocks  •  Wood, Wires & Whiskey  •  Concert Reviews • Motion Reviews --> Recently Reviewed  •  Dvd Reviews  •  Film Reviews  •  Music DVD Reviews  •  TIFF  •  Videogame Reviews • Music School --> Meet & Greet  •  Need to Know  •  Where I play • Contests • Contact --> About Us  • Advertising  • Distribution  • Getting Reviewed  • Getting Published  • Letters To The Editor  • Partnerships  • Subscriptions • Exclaim! Radio --> Aggressive Tendencies Radio  • Beats & Rhymes Radio  • Destination Out Radio  • Frequencies Radio  • Groove Radio  • No Future Radio  • Pop Rocks Radio  • Wood, Wires & Whiskey Radio • Exclaim! TV • Home & Latest Issue • Browse Issues